July 12, 2011

A Fragment of the Dream

Wanted: A generous philanthropist willing to provide funding and support for the artistic development of an aspiring Canadian printmaker, enabling her to stay at home and follow her muse. Fulltime instead of only here and there on weekends.  
If I put an add on Craigslist would I get any takers?
I’m in my Man of La Mancha (”dreaming the impossible dream”) mode again, something that seems to happen whenever I get a rare day off at home to spend on print pursuits.  I should really have more such days, that’s the whole idea behind my working extended hours in exchange for a full day off every few weeks.  But it hardly ever turns out quite like that.   
First, when my days off fell on alternate Fridays, most of my plans for creative time got scuttled because Roland has all his Fridays off.  So instead of drawing, or carving, or printing etc. (because traffic is SO much better on Fridays…NOT!) we went grocery shopping, or took the dog for a haircut, or the car for an oil change, or in quest of any other random mundane whatever that came up.  Not that I don’t enjoy hanging out with Roland.  Really, I absolutely do.  Despite my strong dislike for shopping we have as much fun as anyone can have buying eggs, or canine hair grooming services, or "shnermutzles" at Home Depot.  But I want more creative time dammit!
So when my alternating days off got switched to every third Monday, I sort of regretted the lost opportunities for marital bonding but looked forward to more time to devote to the artwork.  And then my mother got diagnosed with dementia and my father decided to improve his already faltering mental faculties via random bouts of “too much red wine consumption”.  Hence, most of my free Mondays now fall to my parents’ medical/dental appointments.  I'll confess, I’m beginning to have some doubts about all those “abundant/nourishing universe” and “all you need to do is image your dream and it will happen” theories.  Or am I, subconsciously somehow, imaging the wrong things? 
Anyway, yesterday, for the first time in what seems like a very long time, I got a free day.  A full day.  From get-up time to dinner time.  No medical appointments.  No shopping.  My time my own.  Ok, I had to wash the floor and the dog’s box and bedding after he threw up on them sometime during the night but otherwise no responsibilities.  I didn’t even turn on the computer.  I carved and printed and so managed to reach my goal of getting two colours down on this current print this weekend instead of just one.  Here are the three stages so far:

1)  A pale grey background
 2) A darker grey
 3) A pale grey-green

Granted, it was still a bit of a hurdle because on Sunday morning, as I was rousing into the day with fluffy thoughts of how I’d print and then loll around the garden, Roland said: let’s take the day and go for a long drive to Hell’s Gate (two and half hours away) and do some hiking.  And I, good wife that I am, said: ok.  At least if wasn’t the hardware store he wanted to take me to.  In the end we didn’t end up going all that way, we were too late starting, but headed to Harrison Lake instead.  
We stopped at Bridal Falls where neither of us had ever been and took some pictures that, because of the angle, didn’t turn out too well.  Actually the falls were somewhat impressive but I was maybe more awed by what seems to be   erosion and the resulting tangled mass of exposed roots.  It's like a scene in some fantasy world isn't it?

I'm thinking, as usual, there must a print in there somewhere but I'll have to find that patron first, to free up some more days like yesterday. 


Libby Fife said...

The print looks like it is coming along nicely-very subtle and I think it will be a "soothing" kind of effect.

As always, I wish I had something helpful to say about what you are describing. I have all the time in the world yet still get distracted by the things you mentioned, such as the husband and housework. When my husband is home, I want to spend time with him just as you mentioned. I guess the only thing I would say is that it comes down to making some choices and then living with those decisions comfortably. I have accepted too that I won't ever get all of my "ideas" done. And where is that philanthropist anyhow??? LOL!

Beautiful pictures too so thanks:)

Katka said...


You don't need to say anything helpful. I'm lucky to have even the time I do have and I have a good life. It's a bit of the "the grass is always greener on the other side" syndrome.